In a world filled with anger, jealousy, greed, lust and hatred, we get inundated with stories of energy wasted on lives lived full of sin. Yet, above all, there is the most wonderful energy ever created; love. Love is an energy that's ever-present. Sometimes it consumes us and burns as bright as the sun in the sky. At its brightest it's capable of creating the greatest gift of all, the gift of life. Other times it sneaks up on us like a stealthy samurai in the night and surprises us with a precious story of summer romance that'll be remembered in the recesses of one's mind till their dying days. In retrospect, one will sit alone with those thoughts of romance, then suddenly crack a tender smile on their face. That's love. That's what it does. Sometimes love sparks hot for a few years, a few decades maybe, then dwindles. Some hold tight to each burning ember, begging it not to die. Wondering what happened to it. What they did and how they can get that feeling back. And, sometimes, let's be honest, sometimes it dies a horrible tragic death.
Some people are blessed with love and manage to turn up love's magnanimous energy for 50 years together and end up side by side in cemetery plots to become part of the earth together forever as one. While others spread love like a mailman making his rounds through the neighborhood by dosing each person they encounter with a little sprinkle of love's splendid joy. Hey, I don't judge. Some people have a lot of love to give.
Sometimes I sit alone with my thoughts and think about the love that created me, my family members and loved ones. I look at the love stories around me that flourish, create new life, new heartbreak, new joy and new sadness. I feel that energy. I weighs heavy on me at times, yet I'm thankful I've been given the chance to create each new ember of love that consumes my heart and makes me feel alive.
Sometimes one might not understand love, or see it or get it. They might look at it and wonder how it exists between two people. They might see it and feel uncertainty or pain. One thing about love is that it makes a person feel. It touches them in ways they can't explain. That's what arguably the greatest energy in this world can do. Never doubt it. Like a tidal wave capable of crushing a village, it can move lives in different directions. It's definitely a catalyst to create change. Everyone knows that change allows us to learn, grow and progress. Some people believe mistakes are mankind's way of forcing change and making us learn, grow and flourish. We go through life as members of couples, as families, as communities, as countries progressing toward change that hopefully betters our world as a whole. I like to think that way.
For those of you who know me, all this talk of love might seem a bit out of character. I don't talk about it much, yet best believe I see it everyday. I'm aware of love and even let it embrace me if it must. Sometimes a person can sit back, relax and just watch love work. They can watch in awe as it propagates its magic on loved ones, then suddenly twists their lives into uncertainty and despair. I've seen all this over the years. At this point in my life, I don't question love all too much. When it hits someone, I choose to celebrate it with them. Apparently, a new ember or two of love's billowing fire shot up hit my sister and her new beau. The two of them ran away to that city that shines the brightest. You know the one. The one filled with copious quantities of sin. Anyway, back to this love thang. They walked through that city of sin, found a chapel and made their love official to the government. Yep, they got married.
Later today I'm supposed to meet up with the new couple to celebrate their love over a family lunch. To my loving sister, I have this to say. I wish you nothing but the best. May your love burn brighter than the embers of a Nasa rocket ship on its way to the moon. If it dwindles, don't let it die. Work your hardest to get the most out of that energy. Torch that energy and stoke love's fire for all its worth. Enjoy each and every moment of the greatest energy on earth. To my new brother in law, I welcome you. I thank you for your kindness, generosity and love I've witnessed during this courtship. Most of all, I thank you for showing my sister the new love she has needed and celebrate the new story that has been created. May the energy encompassed in these words stoke the fire of your love to ever reaching new heights.
With love,
Brian
Sunday, October 22, 2017
Sunday, September 24, 2017
This one time, at camp, God was my Savior and Jesus was my Homeboy
When I was a young boy, I went to Northwest Basketball camp, a Christian-based basketball camp where they teach you about hoops and pump you full of religion for a week so that mom and dad could get a break from me and enjoy a little bit of their summer vacation all to themselves. While at the camp, I wrote a letter home to my folks. Reading it now, that experience was obviously far more about religion than basketball. By the end of camp, God was my Savior and, like Jessica Simpson says, Jesus was my Homeboy. Wait, maybe it was Jesus was my Savior and God was my Homeboy. Okay, I didn't listen to everything that was said. Point is, at one time in my life, I was pretty jazzed up about religion.
When it comes to religion, I've always tried to do unto others as they would have done unto me, but the whole church on Sundays thing never really worked for me. Like many sports fans, there was just too much great football to watch. But every now and then I'll have an issue in my life and wonder, "what does the bible have to say about that." I mean, it's a good book and 95 percent of Americans stand by it, so there must be some good lessons in there. That's when I usually call my dad. He might not be able to quote every bible verse, but in his long life, I'm sure he's probably read them all. Turns out I've asked him so many times, he actually bought me my very own bible. I looked at it a couple times, and really liked the feel of its thin pages, then I shut it and put it in a drawer. It might be a great book and all, but as it turns out, I'd rather just call Dad for answers.
Anyway, back to this camp. There was the basketball part. I think there was a lake ... oh, and there was this guy who would give speeches while shooting free throws. He was amazing!!! Apparently he could make like 100 in a row. I watched him shoot away, talking about religion and the fundamentals of a perfect free throw shot. I was in awe. He drained basket after basket and I was mesmerized. Life can put you in a trance sometimes and fill you with great knowledge if you let it. I definitely soaked it all in. I mean, he made like 95 out of 100. God was definitely on his side.
Life can also feel like that movie Ground Hog Day sometimes. You know, the famous movie starring Bill Murray. In the movie, he wakes up and lives the same day over and over again. For the last 15 years my life has kind of been like that too. I'm self employed, so every Monday, I go shopping for inventory that I flip on eBay throughout the week. I also photograph prep sports in the evenings. Each morning I sit alone in my office editing those photos and listing items on eBay. Nobody really bothers me. I'm my own boss and I like it that way. One bad thing about it is that I rarely get feedback. I mean, every now and then someone won't like the color of a shirt and they'll tell me "this shirt isn't green, it's olive," but on social media, my photography usually only receives praise.
Many of you know by now that last season I made a comment on one of my photos that was posted to Facebook and the athletic directors didn't like what was written. Ultimately, that comment, was what caused me to lose my credential to shoot for the WPA Network and ended my prep sports coverage. Some of you have asked, what exactly did you say? I'm not going to get into all that here, and actually it doesn't really matter at this point. Point is, according to Facebook analytics, more than 500 people viewed it before I took it down, and my mom was the only one who commented. Nobody said squat about it being inappropriate until I get a call from the AD. When I make a comment, or post a photo. I hope that it can make someone feel special. I post my photos for free to Facebook because my art is, and always will be, about more than the money. I appreciate the photos I sell, but it was always about sharing the moments I capture with my audience. I realize now I should just let the art speak for itself. Lesson learned.
My mistakes as a prep sports photographer are simply an opportunity for the system to become better. A system only becomes better if it can learn and grow. And I really hope the WPA Network can grow into something greater. Something that can pay freelancers a wage to photograph high school athletics instead of leaving it up to chance. A place where the community can go to celebrate the accomplishments of the student-athletes that work so hard each season at their sports. I've heard that some ADs don't want to see it become that, and have never really been keen on the idea of freelancers in their schools. With technology advancing in the way it is, everyone should realize that every student walking the schools with a cell phone is capturing life as it happens and posting it online. It's a way of life now. Instead of choosing to be a cog in the wheel of progress, administration needs to streamline their regulations for such content and communicate it in detail to the communities they represent.
I photographed 37 events last winter. Throughout that time, I saw athletic directors and principals and parents, and nobody ever said anything negative to me about the content and commentary I presented to them on social media. In retrospect, sure, I toed the line about what would be considered appropriate. I made comments to bring more attention to my art. I even wrote a vlog or two purposely slanted in favor of the school I cover. That was all within my first amendment rights. With the increase in platforms to express ideas growing every day, the first amendment's freedom of press component is more important than ever right now. Just because you can end someone's voice within a community doesn't mean you should. My advice for the NWC ADs would be for all athletic directors to work at improving their communication with freelancers. Don't just talk about their photos in special meetings or e-mails they know nothing about. Make them part of the process.
My situation has been an eye opening realization to the power of the 1 percent. In every system, there's usually a collection of the 1 percent who decides what is right and wrong, what is allowed and not allowed. The power of the 1 percent is real. They can change government. They can change process for good and bad. And, believe you me, they can definitely put an end to a freelance photographer editing sports photos for a quorum of fans on Facebook. The 1 percent can change my environment, but they're not going to stop me from taking photos. I'm going to find new adventure in life and document it for all to see. I'm going to be more careful about what I say and reconsider the messages I'm putting out to the world, but they're not going to stop me from capturing photos and making comments that make people feel special. Creating art that makes people feel special is too important to me just give up on.
Like Bill Murray's character in Ground Hog Day, sometimes someone comes along and slaps you awake. That person can change your way of thinking and behaving. I remain grateful. Right now, I'm grateful the most for that person. The strife they've caused me has been painful, but I have already learned and grown from the experience. Life lessons are everywhere if you take the time to open your eyes to them.
When it comes to religion, I've always tried to do unto others as they would have done unto me, but the whole church on Sundays thing never really worked for me. Like many sports fans, there was just too much great football to watch. But every now and then I'll have an issue in my life and wonder, "what does the bible have to say about that." I mean, it's a good book and 95 percent of Americans stand by it, so there must be some good lessons in there. That's when I usually call my dad. He might not be able to quote every bible verse, but in his long life, I'm sure he's probably read them all. Turns out I've asked him so many times, he actually bought me my very own bible. I looked at it a couple times, and really liked the feel of its thin pages, then I shut it and put it in a drawer. It might be a great book and all, but as it turns out, I'd rather just call Dad for answers.
Anyway, back to this camp. There was the basketball part. I think there was a lake ... oh, and there was this guy who would give speeches while shooting free throws. He was amazing!!! Apparently he could make like 100 in a row. I watched him shoot away, talking about religion and the fundamentals of a perfect free throw shot. I was in awe. He drained basket after basket and I was mesmerized. Life can put you in a trance sometimes and fill you with great knowledge if you let it. I definitely soaked it all in. I mean, he made like 95 out of 100. God was definitely on his side.
Life can also feel like that movie Ground Hog Day sometimes. You know, the famous movie starring Bill Murray. In the movie, he wakes up and lives the same day over and over again. For the last 15 years my life has kind of been like that too. I'm self employed, so every Monday, I go shopping for inventory that I flip on eBay throughout the week. I also photograph prep sports in the evenings. Each morning I sit alone in my office editing those photos and listing items on eBay. Nobody really bothers me. I'm my own boss and I like it that way. One bad thing about it is that I rarely get feedback. I mean, every now and then someone won't like the color of a shirt and they'll tell me "this shirt isn't green, it's olive," but on social media, my photography usually only receives praise.
Many of you know by now that last season I made a comment on one of my photos that was posted to Facebook and the athletic directors didn't like what was written. Ultimately, that comment, was what caused me to lose my credential to shoot for the WPA Network and ended my prep sports coverage. Some of you have asked, what exactly did you say? I'm not going to get into all that here, and actually it doesn't really matter at this point. Point is, according to Facebook analytics, more than 500 people viewed it before I took it down, and my mom was the only one who commented. Nobody said squat about it being inappropriate until I get a call from the AD. When I make a comment, or post a photo. I hope that it can make someone feel special. I post my photos for free to Facebook because my art is, and always will be, about more than the money. I appreciate the photos I sell, but it was always about sharing the moments I capture with my audience. I realize now I should just let the art speak for itself. Lesson learned.
My mistakes as a prep sports photographer are simply an opportunity for the system to become better. A system only becomes better if it can learn and grow. And I really hope the WPA Network can grow into something greater. Something that can pay freelancers a wage to photograph high school athletics instead of leaving it up to chance. A place where the community can go to celebrate the accomplishments of the student-athletes that work so hard each season at their sports. I've heard that some ADs don't want to see it become that, and have never really been keen on the idea of freelancers in their schools. With technology advancing in the way it is, everyone should realize that every student walking the schools with a cell phone is capturing life as it happens and posting it online. It's a way of life now. Instead of choosing to be a cog in the wheel of progress, administration needs to streamline their regulations for such content and communicate it in detail to the communities they represent.
I photographed 37 events last winter. Throughout that time, I saw athletic directors and principals and parents, and nobody ever said anything negative to me about the content and commentary I presented to them on social media. In retrospect, sure, I toed the line about what would be considered appropriate. I made comments to bring more attention to my art. I even wrote a vlog or two purposely slanted in favor of the school I cover. That was all within my first amendment rights. With the increase in platforms to express ideas growing every day, the first amendment's freedom of press component is more important than ever right now. Just because you can end someone's voice within a community doesn't mean you should. My advice for the NWC ADs would be for all athletic directors to work at improving their communication with freelancers. Don't just talk about their photos in special meetings or e-mails they know nothing about. Make them part of the process.
My situation has been an eye opening realization to the power of the 1 percent. In every system, there's usually a collection of the 1 percent who decides what is right and wrong, what is allowed and not allowed. The power of the 1 percent is real. They can change government. They can change process for good and bad. And, believe you me, they can definitely put an end to a freelance photographer editing sports photos for a quorum of fans on Facebook. The 1 percent can change my environment, but they're not going to stop me from taking photos. I'm going to find new adventure in life and document it for all to see. I'm going to be more careful about what I say and reconsider the messages I'm putting out to the world, but they're not going to stop me from capturing photos and making comments that make people feel special. Creating art that makes people feel special is too important to me just give up on.
Like Bill Murray's character in Ground Hog Day, sometimes someone comes along and slaps you awake. That person can change your way of thinking and behaving. I remain grateful. Right now, I'm grateful the most for that person. The strife they've caused me has been painful, but I have already learned and grown from the experience. Life lessons are everywhere if you take the time to open your eyes to them.
Sunday, March 19, 2017
A young boy's search for peace, love and joy never ends
As a kid, I never worried about anything. Everything was taken care of for me. My folks did a perfect job of raising me and provided me with all I could ask for and more. As an adult, my search for peace, love and joy isn't always as easy. There's been a few miss steps in my life. I've made a few screw ups. It's par for the course. They happen. I try to always apologize for my mistakes, own up to them and learn and grow from them. I try not to dwell on them, but sometimes I wake up sad. I wake up mad at myself. I wake up thinking about all the joys in my life and can't help but cry a little. Well, not cry cry, but that moment when your eyes fill with tears and you get that lump in your throat. Ya, maybe I'm just one of those sensitive types who needs to wipe my eyes and move on with life, but sometimes I like to live in those moments a little. Maybe a little too long. I like to let those tears sit in my eyes and think about all I have to be thankful for. Today is one of those days.
Yesterday I did my first infant photography shoot. A family was kind and trusting enough to visit my little studio and give me a shot at capturing some precious moments of their little one on his half birthday. Not even a year old and it was obvious this kid was going to grow up with all the peace, love and joy he needs. Just a few years ago, I was busy photographing his mom and dad on the hardwood as star prep athletes playing basketball. His dad had a jump shot like you wouldn't believe. His mom ran the show on the court as the point guard and had a way about her you couldn't help but love to watch. As I watched the young couple get their little guy ready for his studio photo shoot, it made me think a little.
Ya, surprise surprise, Brian got a little nostalgic. I thought back on the love I received growing up and how family can help shape a young child into the adult you want them to be. To me, that idea carries with it a whole lot of responsibility. A daunting amount. Yep, there's a lot to it. A mom and dad will need to fill that boy's life with peace, love and joy for 18 years. And then he's an adult and it's done, right? No, when that young adult questions life and seeks answers, he's gonna call on you. Like me, he might wake up with tears in his eyes some days; wondering where his life is going. He's gonna wipe those tears and need you more than ever for comfort. He's gonna call on you for answers you don't have. If he finds small pockets of happiness in life that are stolen from him, he's going to feel angry, frustration and confusion and call you looking for answers. Be ready.
I'm not going to sit here and pretend I have all the answers. I've never been a dad. I'm sure that in your half year as parents, you've surely learned more than me about parenting, but I will encourage you to look at the pictures we captured yesterday, slow down your busy lives a little and take a second to live in each moment for a bit. Enjoy them for what they are and realize that the joy you felt in studio yesterday, and the joy you feel looking into the eyes of your newborn will not last forever. Soon he'll be one. Then the terrible twos you've heard about. He'll mature into a toddler and turn your young worlds upside down. That toddler will grow into a young boy who will surprise you with the way he sees the world. He'll dazzle you with his intelligence, make you laugh in ways you didn't think possible and create memories you'll never forget. He'll love you unconditionally and fill you with the greatest joy possible on this earth. Ya, let's end this knowing that you're in for quite a ride. Thanks for sharing a little of it with me.
Yesterday I did my first infant photography shoot. A family was kind and trusting enough to visit my little studio and give me a shot at capturing some precious moments of their little one on his half birthday. Not even a year old and it was obvious this kid was going to grow up with all the peace, love and joy he needs. Just a few years ago, I was busy photographing his mom and dad on the hardwood as star prep athletes playing basketball. His dad had a jump shot like you wouldn't believe. His mom ran the show on the court as the point guard and had a way about her you couldn't help but love to watch. As I watched the young couple get their little guy ready for his studio photo shoot, it made me think a little.
Ya, surprise surprise, Brian got a little nostalgic. I thought back on the love I received growing up and how family can help shape a young child into the adult you want them to be. To me, that idea carries with it a whole lot of responsibility. A daunting amount. Yep, there's a lot to it. A mom and dad will need to fill that boy's life with peace, love and joy for 18 years. And then he's an adult and it's done, right? No, when that young adult questions life and seeks answers, he's gonna call on you. Like me, he might wake up with tears in his eyes some days; wondering where his life is going. He's gonna wipe those tears and need you more than ever for comfort. He's gonna call on you for answers you don't have. If he finds small pockets of happiness in life that are stolen from him, he's going to feel angry, frustration and confusion and call you looking for answers. Be ready.
I'm not going to sit here and pretend I have all the answers. I've never been a dad. I'm sure that in your half year as parents, you've surely learned more than me about parenting, but I will encourage you to look at the pictures we captured yesterday, slow down your busy lives a little and take a second to live in each moment for a bit. Enjoy them for what they are and realize that the joy you felt in studio yesterday, and the joy you feel looking into the eyes of your newborn will not last forever. Soon he'll be one. Then the terrible twos you've heard about. He'll mature into a toddler and turn your young worlds upside down. That toddler will grow into a young boy who will surprise you with the way he sees the world. He'll dazzle you with his intelligence, make you laugh in ways you didn't think possible and create memories you'll never forget. He'll love you unconditionally and fill you with the greatest joy possible on this earth. Ya, let's end this knowing that you're in for quite a ride. Thanks for sharing a little of it with me.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)